"I encourage you to stick through as I am sharing this story out of my life."

Almost 6 years ago, I had a deeply transformative experience that led to me coaching, meditating, and a deep curiosity for what allows others to transform.

Back then, I was in the middle of what people call a crisis of meaning, depression, or, in other circles, the dark night of the soul.

I had experienced a few major changes in a very short period of time. I had injuries and, for the first time in my life, questioned if I wanted to continue as a professional dancer. On top of this, I had a very challenging relationship that proved to be unstable, and my mentor at the time and I started to separate.

I had lost the connection to the community I was a part of; I didn't know if my girlfriend and I would stay together If I continued in the profession I had spent 11 years investing in, and I could stop playing the big questions.

Who am I really?
What is life?
What are we here for?
What am I here for?

I started to see that there was my assumed identity, the name, status, profession, and history, that I had assigned meaning to up until this point.

Yet for whatever reason, the normal explanations that most people are satisfied with don't hold true anymore for me.

Every day, I woke up to the total meaninglessness of all I was doing. "How are we busy doing what we are doing if we are all going to die anyway?" I thought to myself. "what's the purpose of my existence?"
"Is there anything after death?" "What is going to die?"

Nothing enlivened me anymore; nothing gave me joy. My mind was continuously spinning around these questions, looking for an answer in the world out there.

And then it happened.

In the midst of a conversation with a friend, in between other people, in the most unusual moment, I had a thought.

A thought:

What you are feeling is coming from your thinking.

followed by,

You don't experience the world; you experience your thinking of the world.

Followed by a tremendous release and a sudden knowing that all I was struggling with was generated in my thoughts, that what I was looking for in the world never could have come from it.

That I was the only one giving meaning to my experience, and I experienced whatever meaning I gave it.

If I would say just living was my purpose, that would now be so; if I thought I had no purpose, that would now be sow.

Suddenly, I wasn't my thoughts anymore, but I was the one seeing the constant stream of thoughts and internal conversations I was having without needing to go with them.

I had exited my depression in a second.

What I saw at that moment has continued to shape my life and the lives of many others as they have gotten to see the same thing.

I realized that I was always, always able to choose to think anew, choose a new story, one that would empower me, as I realized that none of the stories I told myself were true anyhow and that what was true lay beyond thought. In the space in which I fell when I saw all thoughts passing by, in a space without language and story.

As life goes, 2 weeks later, I was introduced to coaching and knew this would be the new chapter of my life.

What this experience taught me is that we can transform, always, in any moment, under any condition, as we have the power to choose a new outlook on life, one that gives us power.

I have seen miracles happen in people when they get to see this, and I continue to experience them in my life.

Don't believe me, but look for yourself and see if there is anything giving your life meaning apart from what you think and say.

P.S.

I deeply value your feedback and input on these writings.
If there is something that sticks out to you, themes you want me to write about, or a specific topic you'd like me to expand on, write me. I read every email I get from you.